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which it wrings out delirious and pas- had the sense and fortitude at least sionate outeries at the very moment to endure punishment with decent when you are lauding your coolness composure. But your whole mind and magnanimity.
seems to be one universal sore of vaniAnd now, before parting with you ty, and the pinch of a finger and for a month, allow me to return you thumb causes you to shriek out, as if my best thanks, for the very kind and you were broken on the wheel, and to condescending permission which, in a burst into insane invectives with the late Number of the Examiner, you very avowal of silence on your pale gave me to come forward and avow quivering lips. Silent you cannot remyself. This was more than kind— main ; and when you speak out against it was generous. I need fear nothing me, what is it you say? Nothing. from you-so you inform me. But it Your abilities, which on some subjects would seem as if there were some are considerable, then utterly desert other formidable Champion into whose you ; and instead of rousing youra hands you would wish slyly to deliver self from your lair, like some noble
Of him, as of you, my contempt beast when attacked by the hunter, is perfect. As you got him to praise you roll yourself round like a sick you and your verses in the Edinburgh hedge-hog, that has crawled out into Review, so may you get him at small the crisp” gravel walk round your cost to defend you in a Sunday News- box at Hampstead, and oppose only paper. But let him have a cooling the feeble prickles of your hunch’d-up draught before he enters the lists. I back to the kicks of one who wishes observed him lately breaking all the less to hurt you, than to drive you inlaws of chivalry, by using foul lan- to your den. guage to some humble squire who had The question at issue between Leigh spied a pimple on his nose. Give him Hunt and Z. is not to be decided by a visor and send him forth to the bat- raving on your side, or contempt on tle. Choose for his shield-bearer the mine. It is to be decided by that flower of the Cockney youth. Have portion of the public who have read warm possets and salves ready against your works, and, if need be, the his return from the combat, and one charges I have brought against them. or two of your own “ Nepheliads” You alone, of all the writers in verse to bring some “ bubbling freshness'
bubbling freshness" of the present day, of any pretensions, to his green wounds. Let this man real or imaginary, to the character of of steel come at his leisure. You poet, have been the secret and invidiat least are disposed of. True that ous foe of virtue. No woman who you called out a foul blow," but it has not either lost her chastity,or is dehas been decided against you by im- sirous of losing it, ever read "The Story partial umpires, and it is evident that of Rimini” without the flushings of you have not weighed your metal shame and self-reproach. A brother before
you rushed into the battle. would tear it indignantly from a sisYour imprudence has been great; had ter's hand, and the husband who saw it not been the offspring of so much his wife's eyes resting on it with any conceit I should have disdained to other expression than of contempt or punish it. The die is cast. It is now disgust, would have reason to look too late to talk of retreating.
with perplexing agony on the counAnd now, for the present, I know not tenances of his children. that I have much more to add. That You may, henceforth, endeavour to you have been irritated to a state of remain silent, and it may be well for lunacy by my Critiques on the Cock- you that you do so. But Í shall hereney School of Poetry, of which you after have much to say to you. Your are the founder, is proved by your vulgar vanity, your audacious arroraving and incoherent denials. You, gance, your conceited coxcombry, who have libelled so many men, ought your ignorant pedantry,-all the mannot to have considered yourself sacred ifold sins and iniquities of Cockneyfrom the hand of vengeance. Above ism lie spread before me as in a all persons living, you, the Editor of map; and I will ot part with your the Examiner, who have so often run. Majesty till I have shewn your crown, a muck, stabbing men, women, and which you imagine is formed of diachildren, should, if unable to defend monds and pearls, to be wholly comyourself when the avenger came, have posed of paste and parchment, and
glass-beads; your robes to be worth- in those scenes of wickedness, where
angry loathing, the obscene and trai-
I shall probe you to the core. I others like you, the deliberate, and
Dedicated to Mr H.
I STOOD, Edina, on thy Bridge of Sighs,
To see from out the loch that structure rise, liation.
As from the touch of dark enchanter's wand?
Mother of lawyers, writers' clerks, and
whores : neutralized by the wholesome chemis
And such she was her daughters had their
From spoils of clients
nor her casements
A FIFTH CANTO
up, the least.
In Reikie sounds the town-guard's drum no Girdles it in a space that may be smelt ! more,
So we go on, I fear to little good Nor cadie plies, nor “wha wants me" is near, Meanwhile the rivals one another pelt ! Her Luckenbooths now choak the common Oh, for one hour of him who knew no feud, shore,
Th' octogenarian chief, the kind old Sandy And “ Gardeloo" but seldom meets the ear.
Wood ! Those days are gone, but wenches still are
here : Lands fall, flats empty-nature doth not die, Nor yet forget how Reikie once was dear,
Notes to Childe Harold's Pilgrimage. With her cheap clarets' bright festivity,
Canto V. Revel of tappet-hen, high-jinks, and mutton-pie!
Chiefly Written by MR H.
“ I stood, Edina, on thy bridge of sighs, pond
For who that passes but has sighed or Above the Provostless city's waning sway:
bann'd," &c. Ours is a trophy which will not decay, With all the Bailies Brodie, Thomas the appellation of bridge of sighs" to the
The reason given in the text for affixing Muir,
bridge commonly called the North Bridge, Leith-pier will ne'er be worn or swept away, which joins the old and new town of EdinThe key-stones of the arch! Though, to be burgh, may be the true one; for the hideous sure,
building alluded to, which, like Satan's What now I would be at, sounds, I must
Pandemonium, lately rose like an exown, obscure !
halation" out of the North Loch, has been The beings of the wynd are not of clay,
more sighed over and execrated by the good Or stone, or lime, or mortar ; they create people of Edinburgh, than any thing which And multiply false keys, or else the ray
has happened in our day, if we except the Of more insidious eloquence; that which fate publication of that unparalleled piece of Prohibits to dull life in this our state blasphemy and scurrility called the Chaldee Of moral bondage, is by such supplied,
MSS. A more accurate investigation, lead. Fine spirits exiled, pilloried, or late
ing to a very curious historical illustraTucked up! No matter ! Leith-pier will tion, will, however, point out a more proabide
bable explanation of this term. It is perThe longest, giving air and exercise beside. haps not generally known to the inhabitants
of this renowned city, that there are certain This the best refuge for our youth and age dungeons called “ pozzi,” or whatever So Hope will tell you—so will Gregory ; other delicate name you may choose to give An old idea peopling many a page, them, sunk in the thick walls of the bridge, As well as that which grows beneath mine which, from the groans that issue from eye :
them, may well get the name of the Bridge Yet these are truths whose strong reality of Sighs. You descend to them by a narOutshines our fairy-land : good news, good row trap-stair, and crawl down through a
passage half-choked by rubbish, to the To hypochondriacs, such whose fantasy depth of two stories below the level of the Those strange quaek-medicines constantly street. If you are in want of consolation amuse,
for the general extinction of Cloacinian paWhich Solomon and Co. are skilful to in- tronage in Edinburgh, perhaps you may fuse.
find it there, though scarcely a ray of light I too have swallowed such—but let themgón glimmers into the narrow gallery which leads They came like truth, and disappeared like
to the cells; and the places of confinement dreams :
themselves are totally dark. A small hole And whatsoe'er they were they're but so so:
in the lower wall admits the damp air from I could replace them if I would, still teems
the loch below, and serves for the deposition My mind with many a nostrum drug, which of the prisoners' food. A wooden cross bar,
raised about two feet from the ground, is Such as I sought for, and at moments found: the only furniture. There are many cells Let these too go for waking reason deenis
in the same line; but there are some beSuch overweening phantasies unsound,
neath the others, and respiration is someAnd other Doctors call, all whom may prisoner was found when the Magistrates
what difficult in the lower holes. Only one Heaven confound !
descended to inspect these hideous recesses, Monro once ruled, and Gregory now reigns ; and he is said to have been confined sixteen George Bell now feels the pulse which John minutes. But the inmates of the dungeons Bell felt;
had left traces of their repentance, or of Dispensaries, Infirmaries, and chains their despair, which are still visible, and Purge, slash, and clank where'er the city's belt may perhaps owe something to recent in
genuity. Some of them appear to have of. on his hands to acquire or to repeat ; “ and, fended against, and others to have belonged said the poor fellow, “ look at my breeks and to, the sacred body, from the indecencies at me; I am starving.” This speech was more and blasphemies, or from the churches and affecting than his performance, which habit belfries, which they have scratched upon the alone can make attractive. The recitative walls. The reader may not object to see a was shrill, screaming, and monotonous, and specimen of the records prompted by so ter- the fisherman behind assisted his voice by rific a solitude. As nearly as they could be plugging his finger into one side of his copied by more than one pencil, four of mouth, and making his cheek sound“ buck" them are as follows :
as he drew it out. The chairman used a 1
quiet action, something like the regular jolt “ Trust no other,
of a chair ; but he became too much interNot even your brother
ested in his subject altogether to repress his Can give thee assistance.-
vehemence. The yerses to which my noble Here goes ! keep your distance !
friend so elegantly alludes are the following: James Craigie.”
“ Glasgow for bells, 2
Linlithgow for wells, “ Speak no word;
Edinburgh for writers and whes." Hold in your breath;
Many, amongst the lower classes, these Press hard
men informed us, are familiar with this inFor life or death.
teresting and most comprehensive stanza, John Buchan of the College Kirk." which, for rapid sketching, is equal to any 3
thing in our language. Friends and foes may say as they please,
STANZA 4. So help me God! I shall here have my ease.
« Provostless city." 4 Pauperibus æque prodest, locupletibus æque, Vates, I remember being taught at Har. Æque neglectum pueris senibusque nocebit. row (I owe all to the benevolent birch of Dr Th. Lamb. Stud. Log. 1817.
Joseph Drury), signifies a prophet as well For a more scientific and statistical view
as a poet. It is in the former character of this subject, see the leading article of Con
that I speak here. Edinburgh has still her stable's Scotch Magazine før March.
Provost and her Bailies, but “ how long ?”.
All the law proceedings on this interesting STANZA 2.
question, as well as every scrap that has been " She looks like old Cybele on Mount Ida,
spoken or written on the subject of the new Rising with her tiara of proud towers."
buildings on the Bridge of Sighs, shall ap. An old writer, describing the appearance
pear in the historical illustrations. of the old town of Edinburgh, has made
“ Brodie.” use of the above image, which could not Thanks to the acumen of the Scotch, we be poetical were it not true,mas Boileau's know as little of Brodie as ever.
The hy“ creaking lyre, that whetstone of the teeth, pothesis which carried many along in its monotony in wire,” has it" Rein n'est current, viz. that he is still alive, is run out ; beau que le vrai.”
and we have thus another proof that we can
never be sure that the paradox, the most STANZA 2.
singular, and therefore having the most s Mother of lawyers, writers, clerks, and agreeable and authentic air, will not give wh-es."
way to the established ancient prejudice. This line alludes to a very curious old It seems however certain, in the first place, rhyme which the author of Childe Harold that although Brodie was born, lived, and and another English gentleman, the writer was hanged, we have no proof that he was of this notice, heard when they were rowed buried. The Grey-friars and the Westto Pettycur with two singers, one of whom kirk may indeed resume their pretensions, was a chairman, and the other a fisherman and even the exploded Calton-hill may again The former placed himself at the bow, the be heard with complacency. That deliberlatter at the stern of the boat. A little after ate duties were performed round a carcase leaving the pier of Leith they began to sing, deposited in one of these three places of and continued their exercise until we arrived interment, twelve hours after the execution, off Inchkeith. They gave us, among other we have incontestible proofs,—but who essays, “ The Death of Sir Patrick Spence,” knows whether it was not the body of one and' “ Wat ye wha's in yon town,” and did who died of the plague, or of the typhus not sing English but Scotch verses. The feyer ? Did any one see the mark of the chairman, however, who was the cleverer rope roạnd the neck ? There was indeed a of the two, and was frequently obliged to false key and a forged note thrown into the prompt his companion, told us that he could grave along with it; but that may have translate the original. He added, that he been done out of mere malice. It does not could sing almost three hundred stanzas, appear
that even Bailie Johnston could bụt had not spirits (fuirntosh was the word bring ocular proof (though he were to prohe used) to learn any more, or to sing what duce the skeleton) that this was the islentihe already knew, Aman must have idle time cal Brodie.
Secondly, Brodie was very tender of his nine inches and a half.”-After having life, and very prudent in his schemes ; and reigned more than thirty years at the head it is well known that he had contrived some of his profession, he died full of years and little machinery, by which the alternate ris- honours, and was buried. Strangely enough ings and fallings of the rope might be obvi- must it sound, that though there are still many ated, and even the first hangman of the age excellent medical practitioners in Edinburgh be deceived. Brodie's love of life was cer- of the name of Wood (not to mention the retainly not Platonic. The happiness which bel quack apothecary who migrated to Manhe longed to possess did not lie in another chester, and called himself Dr Lignum), world, and that he looked upon any such there is not one Sandy among them, vain expectation as either too shadowy, too much of mind, and too little of matter, for As these notes would run out to his taste, may be perhaps detected in at least much too great a length for the poem six places of his own letters. In short, his to which they are appended, it is prolove for life was neither Platonic nor poeti posed to publish the remainder in two Italian, for he lived much with fiddlers) he large quarto volumes, on the model of speaks of " amore veementissimo ma unico Dr Drake's Shakspeare and his times. ed onesta,"-he confesses, in a letter to a
H. friend, that it was guilty and perverse, that it absorbed him quite, and mastered his heart.
SOME REMARKS ON W's ACCOUNT OF “ Thomas Muir.”
THE KRAKEN, COLOSSAL CUTTLE
FISH, AND GREAT SEA SERPENT. Thomas Muir retired to Fontainbleau immediately on being carried into France,
MR EDITOR, after his unsuccessful attempt to escape from I am a sea-faring man, and have, in Botany Bay to America, and, with the excep- my time, seen sights, the mention of tion of his celebrated visit to Paris in com.
which would appear incredible to a pany with Tom Paine, he appears to have
mere landsman, but I confess that passed his last years in that charming soli. tude. He was in a state of great pain from your learned correspondent W. makes his wound for some months previous to his me stare at his apparently well-audeath, but was at last, one morning, found thenticated stories of sea monsters, hidead in his library chair, with his hand rest- therio supposed to have only lived in
The Rights of Man.” The the imagination of poets, or the superchair is still kept among the precious relics stitious fancy of ancient historians. of Fontainbleau ; and from the uninter
And first, If such a sea monster as rupted veneration that has been attached to
the kraken do really exist, –
-a monster every thing relative to this great man, from the moment of his death to the present time, resembling a floating island, with nuit has a better chance of authenticity than
merous arms, equal in length and size even the chair on which the great Napoleon, to the masts of ships,- of such imat the same place, signed his first abdication, mense size, that the Norwegian fisherand which has been waggishly termed his men, (but no other,) do constantly Elba-chair.
endeavour to find out its resting place, STANZA 8.
(which they know, it is said, by the “Oh, for one hour of him who knew no feud, shallowness of the water,) to catch the TH' octogenarian chief, the kind old Sandy fishes that lie round it, as a bank,Wood !"
say, if such a monster has been playThe reader will recollect the exclamation ing its accustomed pranks, during unof the Highlander, “ Oh, for one hour of numbered years, is it not very remarkDundee !" _Sandy Wood (one of the de- able, that 'not one out of seven hunlightful reminiscences of old Edinburgh) was
dred British ships, (exclusive of foat least eighty years of age when in high repute as a medical man, he could yet divert reigners,) which have crossed and rehimself in his walks with the " hie schuil crossed every part of the North Sea, laddies," or bestow the relics of his universal even to polar regions, perhaps four, benevolence in feeding a goat or a raven. or even six, times in one year, should There is a prophecy of Meg Merrilies, in have all been so extremely unfortuwhich these ancients are thus alluded to. nate, (or, I ought rather to say, for“ A gathering together of the powerful shall tunate; for, had any one of these be made amidst the caves of the inhabitants of Dunedin--Sandy is at his rest: they have been fatal as a rock,) as never to
ships run upon this mass, it woulil shall beset his goat, they shall profane his raven, they shall blacken the buildings of have seen one of such sea monsters, the infirmary: her secrets shall be exainin. This is of itself, in my opinion, a sufed: a new goat shall bleat until they have ficient refutation of all the narratives mieasured out and run over fifty-four feet of early voyagers.--the fictions records