1. "Let God have no rival in your heart. The moment you permit the love of man, of pleasure, of money, or any other worldly object, to rival your heavenly Father, you are guilty of sin, and are laying up misery in store. Consider God's excellence, and your infinite obligations to him for your creation, redemption, preservation, for all you are, and all you have, and you must see the propriety of suffering nothing to interfere with your duty to Him. In particular let neither business nor pleasure induce you to violate his holy day, or to absent yourself from his public worship. If possible, prevail on your husband to accompany you, and enforce this duty on your family. But while I urge you to constant piety, I with equal earnestness entreat you to guard against enthusiasm, which is only less dangerous than lukewarmness. — Having drawn a strong line (which must never be obliterated) between the love of God, and the love of man, I add, 2. "Let your husband have no human rival in your affection or confidence, none; no, not even your father, your mother, or your favourite friend. You must leave your father and mother and cleave to your husband, and he must be your favourite friend. I mean not that you are to desert or neglect your other friends, by no means; but while you continue to cherish them with kindness and affection, let them clearly perceive that another now possesses the first place in your heart, and that any attempt to rival him, or criticise his conduct, will lower them in your esteem, and if persisted in, put an end to all connection between you and them. Love, and love only is the loan for love.' If, therefore, you desire to enjoy your husband's affection and confidence, give him your's, and convince him that he possesses them fully and completely, by concealing nothing from him. To win a man when all your arts succeed, This must now be one main business of your life, and yet a single rule heartily adopted and steadily adhered to, will generally ensure success. 3. "Make, then, your husband's happiness your own: study his disposition, his temper, his inclinations, his amusements; and let it be your constant endeavour to conform yourself to them. Accustom yourself to be pleased with what pleases him, and to find your happiness in promoting his. 4. "Do not raise your expectations too high. This life was intended to be a state of trial, not of unalloyed enjoyment. However passion or affection may now present him, time will show you your intended partner such as he is, a fallen creature, like yourself, full of frailties, errors, and imperfections. To bear with them is no less your interest than your duty. 5." On each return of your wedding day, read attentively this paper, and the whole form of solemnization of matrimony. Consider well the solemn promise and vow you therein made, to obey and serve your husband, to love and honour him, and remember always that you freely and voluntarily took him for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, and that even until death. Let no one therefore persuade you that any human power can dissolve that contract, or that you ought to govern, who promised to obey. 6. "Good people are more liable to differ about trifles, than about more important concerns. Be on your guard against this; in particular, if at any time, you perceive your husband's temper moved, be careful not to add fuel to the flame, but rather abate it by a soft answer, a kind look, an endearing embrace. 7 "If solid happiness we prize, And they are fools who roam; From our own selves our joys must flow, "Let it be your constant care to make that hut pleasing to your husband. To this nothing will contribute more essentially than cheerfulness, neatness, and decorum. He will not readily return who expects to be received with silence and yawning; probably you have sometimes adorned your person in hopes to please your lover, take care that, by neglecting it, you do not disgust your husband. Time will abate passion, and diminish personal attractions; but neatness of dress, and elegance of manners, will in a good degree supply their place. Above all, avoid every thing which has the least tendency to indelicacy or indecorum. Few women have any idea how much men are disgusted at the slightest approach to these in any female, and especially in one to whom they are attached. By attending the nursery, or the sick bed, women are too apt to acquire a habit of conversing on such subjects in language which men of delicacy are shocked at. In short, if you wish to preserve your influence, you must use the same means which you employ to obtain it. If good women took half the pains to secure their husbands' affections which bad women exert to seduce them, the latter would seldom succeed. 8. "By marriage, besides the more immediate duties of a wife, you pledge yourself to the performance of all those which belong to the mistress of a family. For these, therefore, you should qualify yourself; to these you must not disdain to devote a considerable portion of your time and attention. If you despise or neglect them, you despise or neglect a positive duty, essential to the preservation of your husband's fortune, as well as to his comfort, and that of his friends and domestics. Never make a confidant of a servant, or be familiar with your maids. Be not harsh or severe towards them, and speak kindly to them, but keep them at a due distance. 9. "In these and in similar concerns be prudent but not anxious. 'Let folk bode well, and strive to do their best, No more's required, let Heaven make out the rest.' "Set not your heart on any worldly objects, and, least of all, on money. Learn from your husband what he can afford to spend, and be very careful not to exceed; but if you save any thing, let it be for the poor, and the stranger, and be sure to allot to pious or charitable uses as much as you can spare out of your allowance for your personal expences, for that only is your gift. 10. "Most wives wish to become mothers, and this wish, like many others, is innocent, if coupled with cheerful submission to the will of God. Children are anxious blessings, and bring with them numberless cares. Their lives are at first so precarious, that one-fourth of the number born die within the first year, and another fourth in the next six years; and, even after that, we know too well that they are mortal. But should they live, by sickness or imprudence (not to mention grosser misconduct) they may cause you many a heart-ache. If, therefore, you should have no children, be content; if you should be a joyful mother, be thankful; but remember, that he who gave you a child, may see fit to resume the gift, and probably will do so, if you suffer yourself to doat on it, or having more than one, show an undue partiality. “ Had I leisure I might still add to this long sermon, but by so doing I might defeat my purpose, which is, not to damp your spirits, but to prevent disappointment. In order to this, it is necessary to view things in their true light: 'To be resign'd when ills betide, "And now, 'Farewell! and Oh! may Heaven shed Of her whose kind maternal care Which, when all worldly cares shall cease, "These lines appeared so apposite, both to you and to your mother, that I could not resist copying them. But lest borrowed rhimes should lead you to doubt the seriousness of my concern for your welfare, I will add my earnest prayer, that the blessing of God may ever attend you, his power protect you, and his grace enable you to fulfil all the duties of that state of life to which it hath pleased him to call you. "I am, with much esteem and affection, Most truly yours." May one be permitted to add to these admirable rules one suggestion, namely, that a wife should |