grew up one of the most self-willed little animals that ever had legs. Whenever I did any thing wrong, my father was sure to abuse me in the most violent terms; when my my mother would as surely take my part; and a battle was the immediate consequence. And these contests

generally terminated in the same manner :-My father would shrug up his shoulders and say to my mother "Well, Mrs. Levis! you are spoiling that child ;" and she would pout her lip and answer-"O! it will be time enough to correct him when he's grown up."

By the time I had completed my fifth year my love of mischief was inordinate. I destroyed every thing I could get into my power: I scribbled over my father's sermons, burnt holes in my mother's aprons, hung the cat up by the hind legs, and played a thousand other "roguish tricks" (as my mother called them.) But my chief delight lay in tormenting the company that frequented the house :-I would pin the gentlemen's coat tails together, set fire to their wigs, etc.—and as for the ladies" Agedum pauca accipe-."

One evening, when several of the neighbours were assembled in the parlour at tea, I was called in to exhibit myself. I was then considered as a very pretty little boy; and it was my mother's delight to dress me in the most fantastical manner, and thus extort praises of my beautyand her taste-from all her visitors.-Most of the present company were women of large families: but there was one married woman in the room, who had never been blessed with children; and she was more extravagant than any in her admiration of my infantile graces and-accomplishments! However, with the common instinct of children and puppies, I perceived at once that she really disliked me; and consequently, I considered her the most suitable person to play my pranks upon. Hitherto I had shunned all her caresses; but just when she had received a cup of hot tea, and was beginning to stir the mixture affectedly to and fro-as elderly ladies will do in compa

ny,-looking at the same time sour enough to clot the cream, I rushed affectionately towards her, and dashed the cup with its scalding contents directly in her face. The lady screamed, as well she might; I only danced about the room laughing most vociferously, and clapping my little hands for joy. But in the midst of my rejoicing, as if to teach me that even at my tender age human pleasure was but fleeting, my father roughly seized me by the arm, boxed my ears, and ordered me to leave the room directly, and go to bed. Do you think I obeyed him? No! I ran, as usual in such cases, behind my mother (who had seemed rather pleased at my behaviour than otherwise.) My father looked perplexed-my mother looked perfectly composed; my father looked as though he were about to say something-my mother actually did say something.

"He meant no harm, Mr. Levis, I'm sure. It was only child's play; and he has promised never to do so again"-(patting me proudly upon the head.)

The reverend gentleman found his voice :

"Mrs. Levis, I'm astonished at your conduct! Do you mean to encourage that boy in every kind of deviltry? Do you intend to teach him, woman, to rebel against his father?-Leave the room, sir, this instant! I insist upon

it!"

I had to obey him: but my mother immediately followed me!

This is but one of a number of instances, in which my mother's folly was directly teaching me, that, in whatever degree I might offend my father, I had only to fly to her to be shielded from all consequences.

Another year rolled by

I say "rolled," not because that word is generally adopted to denote the course of time-I hate vulgarity !-; but because it is particularly expressive of the season of my life for which I have used it. For, between ourselves, beloved Reader, there is a wide difference in our concep、

tions of the passage of the year at different periods of our existence. Before the age of puberty, her car rolls heavily onward, like an old family-coach: but after that period the party-coloured Hours, the Year's smug coachmen, whip up their prancing steeds, and hurry their mistress to her journey's end before we can detect the colour of her wheels.

Another year rolled by; and my seventh birth-day found me as wicked as you imagine, and ignorant of all school knowledge, saving my alphabet. For though I was by no means dull, and though my father undertook to instruct me, yet-thanks to his partner's kindness !—I never took a book in my hand oftener than once a week; and then I used its leaves to make chickens and ferryboats.

Ever since I had thrown off the petticoat and put on the trowsers, I had slept in a little room adjoining my mother's apartment; and during the summer season the door of communication was left constantly open, in order to afford the air a freer circulation. One morning as I lay awake in my little bed-But here it

is proper to inform you, patient Reader, that with the commencement of this paragraph I assume a new character. Hitherto you have listened to me kindly; but you have listened to me as you would to the parrot, which repeats what it hears, but without knowing what it repeats. It is true I have had one superiority over the bird:-in understanding what I have been saying-though of its truth or falsehood I know no more than he-and that is all.* But from this time I assume a new characYou are now to listen to me as the grave historian of my own thoughts, words, and actions, responsible for every thing I utter, whether of myself or others; for I remember, as well as if they were but the offspring of yesterday, every deed, every word, every feeling, which has been my delight or my misery "since these arms of

ter.

*As you will be assured by consulting the note at the end of the first chapter of this book.

mine had seven years' pith."-O memory! thou art a blessing and a curse!-Sweet is it, when the wings of evening brood over the drowsy earth, to hear thy gentle whisper, as thou comest on velvet foot, telling of days of by-gone pleasure, and scenes whose little roughnesses have all been softened down by the nice touch of distance; but bitter-O, bitter as the sick man's draught-yet full as wholesome! to hear that whisper changed to the hoarse voice of upbraiding, when thou chargest us with deeds, whose harshness Time's finger cannot smooth-thoughts whose blackness but I forget myself.

One morning, as I lay awake in my little bed cogitating on new plans of mischief, I heard my name mentioned in no gentle manner by my reverend father. "Little pitchers" saith the homely proverb "have big ears"-and you may be sure that mine played me not false. Thus he began in a voice of great solemnity :—

"Yes, my love!" softly answered my mother. She must have awoke in a very affectionate humour; for it was the first time I had ever heard her address my father by so tender an appellation.

"I will not reproach you now, Mary, for your indiscreet indulgence of Jeremy. I know it all arises from an excess of motherly affection. But do you not think that Jeremy is very ignorant for a boy of his age?

My mother made no answer.

Now, Mary, it is a duty we owe to God, as well as to ourselves, not merely to keep unsullied the purity of his morals; but to see that he improves those mental faculties which a wise Providence has thought fit to bestow upon him.-I say, wife, that Jeremy shall go to school this very day!"

That horrid "school" was enough for me: I waited not for more

"I wont go to school, Ma'!" I exclaimed, rushing into her bed room" No-I wont !"

In an instant my father's solemnity was gone-politely giving place to his passion. "What's that you say, sir ?" he roared, while his long legs, in their native state, made an awful spring from the bed-" you wont, wont you? you scoundrel!"-And simultaneously with his legs his right arm formed an acute angle: but when he had leaped out of the bed, I had leaped into it-and the geometrical figure was spoiled. "Come out of that bed, sir! come out this instant, you ungrateful whelp! come out, I say!" I made no answer; but, with my mother's trembling aid, gently slid out by the other side, and flew up the garret stairs to Betty's sheltering arms; where I lay in the utmost trepidation (though I might have known that my father was too modest a man to intrude on Betty's privacy) till my poor mother brought me my clothes. In what way my parents settled the dispute I know not: but my mother told me that she had come off conqueror; and certain it is, that for a whole week I heard not the name of school.

-

But that week was like all others in the calendar-too honest to outlive its appointed period. On the day which terminated it, pleased by the matin hymns of some little feathered choristers, I generously resolved to reward their piety by a few bits of - stone. So "up I rose and donn'd my clothes;" and sallied forth to their Epicurean concert room where whom should I meet, parading its gravelled avenues, but my reverend sire.-If the reader has paid a certain list of mine that attention which it merits, he will remember that my father rose early, leaving my mother in bed.—I wished him good morning with my usual impudence, and proceeded to distribute my alms. But he laid his hand upon my shoulderStop sir! put an end to your deviltry!-we will now see who is master!" So saying, he forced me right about ; and we returned together to the house.

66

"Here, Betty! prepare some breakfast for Master Jeremy-no sobbing sir! and hark you, sir, be pleased to take as little time at your meal as possible !"