T STELLENBOSH (Composite Columns) HE General 'eard the firin' on the flank, An' 'e sent a mounted man to bring 'im back The silly, pushin' person's name an' rank 'Oo'd dared to answer Brother Boer's attack. For there might 'ave been a serious engagement, An' 'e might 'ave wasted 'alf a dozen men; So 'e ordered 'im to stop 'is operations round the kopjes, An' 'e told 'im off before the Staff at ten! And it all goes into the laundry, But it never comes out in the wash, 'Ow we're sugared about by the old men ('Eavy-sterned amateur old men!) That 'amper an' 'inder an' scold men The General 'ad 'produced a great effect,' The General 'ad the country cleared-almost; The General''ad no reason to expect,' And the Boers 'ad us bloomin' well on toast! For we might 'ave crossed the drift before the twilight, Instead o' sitting down an' takin' root; But we was not allowed, so the Boojers scooped the crowd, To the last survivin' bandolier an' boot. The General saw the farm'ouse in 'is rear, An' 'e kept us muckin' round till 'e 'ad done. So 'e took a book an' dozed while the other columns closed, The General saw the mountain-range ahead, An' telegraphed the Boojers wouldn't fight. He was markin' time to earn a K. C. B. The General got 'is decorations thick (The men that backed 'is lies could not complain), The Staff 'ad D. S. O.'s till we was sick, An' the soldier-'ad the work to do again! For 'e might 'ave known the District was a 'otbed, To a man 'oo 'ad to fight 'alf a year to put it right, An' it all went into the laundry, But it never came out in the wash. That 'amper an' 'inder an' scold men HALF-BALLAD OF WATERVAL W HEN by the labour of my 'ands I ain't transported with delight. Be'ind the pegged barb-wire strands, If I 'ave learned at Waterval The meanin' of captivity. They'll never know the shame that brands- The mockin' from the sentry-stands, Since I 'ave learned at Waterval They'll get those draggin' days all right, (If it was mine) to set 'em free I PIET (Regular of the Line) Do not love my Empire's foes, 'Oom you are paid to kill? Ah there, Piet!-'is trousies to 'is knees, 'Is coat-tails lyin' level in the bullet-sprinkled breeze; 'E does not lose 'is rifle an' 'e does not lose 'is seat, I've known a lot o' people ride a dam' sight worse than Piet! I've 'eard 'im cryin' from the ground Like Abel's blood of old, An' skirmished out to look, an' found I've waited on till 'e was dead (Which couldn't 'elp 'im much), But many grateful things 'e's said To me for doin' such. |