Ye! who in Granta's honours would surpass
Must mount her Pegasus, a full-grown ass; 950
A foal well worthy of her ancient dam,
Whose Helicon is duller than her Cam.

There CLARKE, still striving piteously "to please," Forgetting doggrel leads not to degrees,

A would-be satirist, a hired Buffoon,

A monthly scribbler of some low Lampoon,
Condemned to drudge the meanest of the mean,
And furbish falsehoods for a magazine,
Devotes to scandal his congenial mind;
Himself a living libel on mankind*.

960

* This person, who has lately betrayed the most rapid symptoms of confirmed authorship, is writer of a poem denominated the "Art of Pleasing," as "Lucus a non lucendo," containing little pleasantry, and less poetry. He also acts as monthly stipendiary and collecter of calumnies for the Satirist. If this unfortunate young man would exchange the magazines

Oh dark asylum of a Vandal race*!

At once the boast of learning, and disgrace;
So sunk in dullness and so lost in shame

That SMYTHE and HODGSONT scarce redeem thy

fame!

But where fair Isis rolls purer wave,

The partial Muse delighted loves to lave,
On her green banks a greener wreath is wove,
To crown the Bards that haunt her classic grove,

for the mathematics, and endeavour to take a decent degree in his university, it might eventually prove more serviceable than his present salary.

"Into Cambridgeshire the Emperor PROBUS transported a considerable body of Vandals."-GIBBON'S Decline and Fall, pag. 83, vol. 2. There is no reason to doubt the truth of this assertion; the breed is still in high perfection.

†This gentleman's name requires no praise: the man who in translation displays unqestionable genius, may well be expected to excel in original composition, of which it is to be hoped we shall soon see a splendid specimen.

Where' RICHARDS wakes a genuine poet's fires And modern Britons justly praise their Sires*.970

For me, who thus unasked have dared to tell
My country, what her sons should know too well,
Zeal for her honour bade me here engage

The host of ideots that infest her age.

No just applause her honoured name shall lose,
As first in freedom, dearest to the Muse.
Oh! would thy Bards but emulate thy fame
And rise, more worthy, Albion, of thy name!
What Athens was in science, Rome in power,
What Tyre appeared in her meridian hour, 980
'Tis thine at once, fair Albion, to have been,
Earth's chief dictatress, Ocean's mighty queen:
But Rome decayed, and Athens strewed the plain,
And Tyre's proud piers lie shattered in the main;

* The " Aboriginal Britons," an excellent poem by

RICHARDS.

Like these thy strength may sink in ruin hurled,
And Britain fall, the bulwark of the World.
But let me cease, and dread CASSANDRA's fate,
With warning ever scoffed at, till too late;
To themes less lofty still my lay confine,
And urge thy Bards to gain a name like thine.990

Then, hapless Britain! be thy rulers blest, The senate's oracles, the people's jest! Still hear thy motley orators dispense The flowers of rhetoric, though not of sense, While CANNING's colleagues hate him for his wit, And old dame PORTLAND* fills the place of PITT.

Yet once again adieu! ere this the sail That wafts me hence is shivering in the gale;

was

* A friend of mine being asked why his Grace of P. likened to an old woman? replied, "he supposed it was because he was past bearing."

And Afric's coast and Calpe's * adverse height, And Stamboul's † minarets must greet my sight:

t

Thence shall I stray through beauty's‡ native clime, Where Kaff§ is clad in rocks, and crowned with snows sublime.

But should I back return, no lettered rage
Shall drag my common-place book on the stage:
Let vain VALENTIA|| rival luckless CARR,
And equal him whose work he sought to mar;

Calpe is the ancient name of Gibraltar,

+ Stamboul is the Turkish word for Constantinople.

Georgia, remarkable for the beauty of its inhabitants.

§ Mount Caucasus.

|| Lord VALENTIA (whose tremendous travels are forthcoming with due decorations, graphical, topographical, and typographical) deposed, on Sir JOHN CARR's unlucky suit that DUBOIS's satire prevented his purchase of the "Stranger in Ireland."- Oh fie, my Lord! has your Lordship no more feeling for a fellow-tourist? but "two of a trade," they say, &c.