« AnteriorContinuar »
Forir Feinagle's were an useless art,
Ja virtues nothing earthly could surpass lier, And he himselí obliged to shut up shop-- he Save thine 'incomparable oil,' Macassar !* Coull never make a menory so fine as
Perfect she was; but as perfection is
Insipid in this naughty world of ours,
Where our first parents never learn'd to kiss TIer noblest virtue was her magnanimity ;
Till they were exiled from their earlier bowers, Her wit (she sonetimes tried at wit) was Attic all, Where all was peace, and innocence, and biss, ller serious sayings darken d to sublimity;
(I wonder how they got through the twelve hours), In short, in all things she was fairly what I call
Don Jose, like a lineal son of Eve, A prodigy: her morning dress was dimity,
Went plucking various fruit without her leave. Her evening silk, or, in the summer, muslin,
XIX. And other stuffs, with which I
He was a mortal of the careless kind, puzzling.
With no great love for learning or the learn'd, XIII. She knew the Latin--that is, the Lord's prayer,'
Who chose to go where'er he had a mind,
And never dream'd his lady was concern'd: And Grock--the alphabet-I'in nearly sure;
The world, as usual, wickedly inclined She read sonie French romances here and there,
To see a kingdom or a house o'erturned, Although her mode of speaking was not pure ;
Whisper'd he had a mistress, some said two For native Spanish she had no great care,
But for domestic quarrels one will do.
Now Donna ez had, with all her incrit,
A great opinion of her own good qualities;
Neglect, indeed, requires a saint to bear it,
And such, indeed, she was in her moralities : And said there was analogy between 'em;
But then she had a devil of a spirit, She proved it somehow out of sacred song,
And sometimes mix'd up fancies with realities, But I must leave the proofs to those who've And let few opportunities escape scen 'em
Of getting her liege lord into a scrape. But this I licard her say, and can't be wrong,
.X.XI. And all inay think which way their judgments lean 'em,
This was an easy matter with a man • 'Tis strange-the Hebrew noun which means
Oft in the wrong, and never on his guard;
And even the wisest, do the best they can, The English always use to govern d-n.'
ilave moments, hours, and days, so unprepard, XV
That you might 'brain them with their lady's fan; Some women use their tongues--she look'd a And sometimes ladies hit exceeding hard, lecture,
And fans turn into falchions in fair hands, Each eye a sermon, and her brow a homily
And why and wherefore no one understands. An all-in-all sufficient sell-director,
XXII. Like the launcatel late Sir Samuel Romilly,
'Tis pity learned virgins ever wed The Law's cxpounder, and the State's corrector, Whose suicide was almost an anomaly-
With persons of no sort of education,
Or gentlemen who, though well-born and bred, One sad example more, that 'All is vanity
Grow tired of scientific conversation : (The jury brought their verdict in 'Insanity').
I don't choose to say much upon this head,
l'in a plain man, and in a single station; In short, she was a walking calculation,
D:t-Oh! ye lords of ladies intellectual, Miss Edgeworthi's novels stepping from their Inform us truly, have they not henpeck'il you all? covers,
XXIIT. Or Mrs. Trimmer's books on edication,
Don Juse and his lady quarrell'd-why, Or.Coelebs' Wife' set out in quest of lovers;
Not any of the many could divine, morality's prim personificatio!,
Though several thousanıl people chose to try ; In which not Envy's self a fiaw discovers;
'Twas surely no concern of theirs noinine. To others' share let 'female errors fall,
I loathie that low vice curiosity;
But if there's anything in which I shinc,
'Tis in arranging all my friends' affairs, Oh! she was perfect, past all parallel
Not having, of my own, domestic cares. Ofany modern female saint's comparison;
XXIV. So far above the cunning powers of hell,
And so I interfered, and with the best Her guardian angel had given up his garrison:
Intentions; but their treatmen: was not kind liveu her ininutest inotions went as well As those of the best timepiece inade by Harri.
* Description des verius incomparables de l huile S011.
Macassar, --Sec the Adrertisement
I think the foolish people were possessid,
XXXI. For neither of them could I ever find,
And if our quarrels should rip up old stories, Although their porter afterwards confessid
And help them with a lie or two additional, But that's no matter, and the worst's behind, I'm not to blame, as you well know, no more is For little Juan o'er me threw, down stairs,
Any one else-they were become traditionui: A pail of housemaid's water, unawares.
Besides, their resurrection aids our glories
By contrast, which is what we just were wishing A little curly-headed, good-for-nothing,
And science profits by this resurrection- fall; And mischief-inaking monkey from his birth ;
Dead scandals form good subjects for dissection. His parents ne'er agreed except in doting
XXXII. Upon the most unquiet imp on earth:
Their friends had tried at reconciliation, Instead of quarrelling, had they been both in
Then their relations, who made matters worse; Their senses, they'd have sent young master
("Twere hard to tell upon a like occasion forth
To whom it may be best to have recourseTo school, or had him soundly whipped at home,
I can't say much for friend or yet relation):
The lawyers did their utmost for divorce,
But scarce a fee was paid on either side,
Beforc, unluckily, Don Jose died. For some time an unhappy sort of life,
XXXIII. Wishing each other, not divorced, but dead.
He died: and most unluckily, because They lived respectably as man and wife;
According to all hints I could collect Their conduct was exceedingly well-bred,
From counsel learned in those kinds of laws And gave no outward signs of inward strise,
(Although their taik's obscure and circumspect), Until at length the smother'd fire broke out,
His death contrived to spoil a charming cause: And put the business past all kind of doubt.
A thousand pities also with respect
To public feeling, which on tiis occasion
Was manifested in a great sensation. And tried to prove her loving lord was mad;
XXXIV. But as he had some lucid intermissions,
But ah! he died; and buried with him liy She next decided he was only bad;
The public feeling and the lawyers' fees: Yet when they ask'd her for her depositions,
His house was sold, his servants sent away, No sort of explanation could be had,
A Jew took one of his two mistiesses, Save that her duty both to man and God
A priest the other-at least so they say: Required this conduct—which seem'd very odd. I asked the doctors after his deceaseXXVIII.
He died of the slow fever call'd the tertian, She kept a journal, where his faults were noted,
And left his widow to her own aversion.
That I must say, wlio knew him very well : Besides her good old grandmother (who doted): Therefore his fraiities I'll no further sca:), Thc hearers of her case became repeaters,
Indeed, there were not many more to tell ; Then advocates, inquisitors, and judges
And if his passions now and then outran
Discretion, and were not so peaceable
As Numa's (who was also named Pompilius),
He had been ill brought up, and was born bilious. With such serenity her husband's woes,
XXXVI. Just as the Spartan ladies did of yore,
Whate'er miglit be his worthlessness or worth, Who saw their spouses kill'd, and nobly close
Poor fellow! he had many things to wound him, Never to say a word about them more.
Let's own, since it can do no good on earth; Calmly she heard each calumny that rose, And saw his agonies with such sublimity,
It was a trying inoment that which found him That all the world exclaim'd, 'What magnani.
Standing alone beside his desolate hearth,
Where all his household gods lay shiver'd rond mity!'
him : XXX. No doubt this patience, when the world is damn.
No choice was left his feelings or his pride, ing us,
Save death, or Doctors' Commons-so he died. Is philosophic in our former friends;
XXXVII. 'Tis also pleasant to be deem'd inagnarimci's, Dying intestate, Juan was sole heir The more so in obtaining our own ends;
To a Chancery suit, and messuages, and lands, And what the lawyers call a'malus arrimas, Which, with a long minority and care,
Conduct like this by no means comprehendis: Promised to turn out well in proper hands : Revenge in person's certainly no virtue,
Inez liccame sole guardian, wi:ich was fair, But then 'tis not my fault if other's hut yoii.
And answer'd but to nature's just demands;
An only son left with an only mother,
Judiciously, from out the schoolboy's vision, Is brought up much more wisely than another. The grosser parts; but fearful to deface XXXVIII.
Too much their modest bard by this oinission, Sagest cf women, even of widows, she
And pitying sore his mutilated case, Resolved that Juan should be quite a paragon,
They only add them all in an appendix, * And worthy of the noblest pedigree
Which saves in fact the trouble of an index : (His sire was of Castile, liis dam from Arragon):
XLV. Then for accomplishments of chivalry,
For there we have them all at one fell swoop,' In case our lord the king should go to war again, Instead of being scatter'd through the pages He learned the arts of riding, fencing, gunnery, They stand forth marshall'd in a handsome troop, And low to scale a fortress--or a nunnery.
To meet the ingenuous youth of future ages, XXXIX
Till some less rigid editor shall stoop But that which Donna Inez most desired,
To call them back into their separate cages, And saw into herself, each day, before ail
Instead of standing staring all together, The learned tutors whom for him she hired,
Like garden-gods and not so decent cither. Was, that his breeding should be strictly moral.
XLVI. Much into all his studies she inquired,
The Missal, too (it was the family Missal), And so they were submitted first to her, all,
Was ornamented in a sort of way Arts, sciences, no branch was made a mystery
Which ancient mass-books often are, and this all To Juan's eyes, excepting natural history.
Kinds of grotesques illumined ; and how they, XL,
Who saw those figures on the margin kiss all, The languages, especially the dead;
Could turn their optics to the text and pray, The sciences, and most of all the abstruse; Is more than I know-but Don Juan's mother The arts, at least all such as could be said
Kept this herself, and gave her son another. To be the most remote from common use :
Sermons he read, and lectures he endured,
And homilies, and lives of all the saints;
To Jerome and to Chrysostom inured, Was ever sufferd, lest he should grow vicious.
He did not take such studies for restraints: XLI.
But how faith is acquired, and then ensured, His classic studies made a little puzzle,
So well not one of the aforesaid paints Because of filthy loves of gods and goddesses,
As Saint Augustine in his fine confessions, Who in the earlier ages raised a bustle,
Which make the reader envy his transgressions. But never put on pantaloons or boddices. His reverend tutors had at times a tussle,
XLVIII. And for their Æneids, Iliads, and Odysseys,
This, too, was
seald book to little JuanWere forced to make an odd sort of apology,
I can't but say that his mamma was right,
If such an education was the true one. For Donna Inez dreaded the mythology.
She scarcely trusted him from out her sight: XLII.
ler maidis were old; and if she took a new one, Ovid's a rake, as half his verses show him,
You might be sure she was a perfect fright Anacreon's morals are a still worse sample,
She did this during even her husband's life-
I recommend as much to every wife.
XLIX. Where the sublime soars forth on wings more Young Juan wax'd in goodliness and grace; ample ;
At six a charming child, and at eleven
He studied steadily, ani grew apace,
And seem'd at last in the right road to heaven. For early stomachis to prove wholesome food;
For half his days were pass'd at church, the other I can't help thinking Juvenal was wrong,
Detween his tutors, confessor, and mother, Although no doubt his real intent was good,
L. For speaking out so plainly in his song,
At six, I said, he was a charming child, So much, indeed, as to be downright rude;
At twelve he was a fine but quiet boy; And then what proper person can bc partial
Although in infancy a little wild, To all those nauseous cpigranis of Martial?
They tamed him down amongst them: to destroy XLIV.
Ilis natural spirit not in vain they toil'd : Juan was taught from out the best edition,
At least it seemnd so; and his mother's joy Expurgated by learned men, who place,
* Fact. There is, or was, such an edition, with all • See Longinus, sec. 10,
thie obnoxious epigrams of Martial placed by the selves at the end.
Was to declare how sage, and still, and steady, In that point so precise in each degree
That they bred in and in, as might be shown,
Marrying their cousins - nay, their aunts and LI.
nieces, I had my doubts, perhaps I have them still,
Which always spoils the breed, if it increases. But what I say is neither here nor there; I knew his father well, and have some skill
LVIII. In character-but it would not be fair
This heathenish cross restored the breed again, From sire to son to augur good or ill:
Ruin'd its blood, but much improved its flesh; He and his wife were an ill-sorted pair
For from a root the ugliest in old Spain But Scandals ny aversion– I protest
Sprung up a branch as beautiful as fresh: Against all evil-speaking, even in jest.
The sons no more were short, the daughters plain
But there's a rumour, which I fain would hush, LII.
'Tis said that Donna Julia's grandmamma For my part I say nothing-nothing-but
Produced her Don more heirs at love than law, This I will say--my reasons are my own
LIX. That if I had an only son to put
However this might be, the race went on To school (as God be praised that I have none),
Improving still through every generation, 'Tis not with Donna Inez I would shut
Until it centred in an only son, Him up to learn his catechism alone :
Who left an only daughter: my narration No-no-I'd send him out betimes to college,
May have suggested that this single one
Could be but Julia (whom on this occasion
I shall have much to speak about), and she
LX As well as all the Greek I since have lost :
Her eye (I'm very fond of handsome eyes) I say that there's the place-but' Verbum sat.
Was large and dark, suppressing half its fire I think I pick'd up too, as well as most,
Until she spoke, then through its soft disguise Knowledge of matters--but no matter what: Flash'd an expression more of pride than ire, I never married-but I think, I know
And love than either; and there would arise, That sons should not be educated so.
A something in thein which was not desire,
But would have been, perhaps, but for the soul Young Juan now was sixteen years of age,
Which struggled through and chasten d down the
whole. Tall, handsomc, slender, but well knit: he seem'd
LXI. Active, though not so sprightly, as a page ;
Her glossy hair was cluster d o'er a brow And everybody but his mother deem'd
Bright with intelligence, and fair and smooth; Him almost man; but she flew in a rage
Her eyebrow's shape was like the aerial bow, And bit her lips (for else she might have scream'd)
Her cheek all purple with the beam of youth, If any said so, for to be precocious
Mounting at times to a transparent glow, Was in her eyes a thing most atrocious.
As if her veins ran lightning : she, in sooth LV.
Possess'd an air and grace by no means common; Amongst her numerous acquaintance, all
Her stature tall-I hate a dumpy woman. Selected for discretion and devotion,
LXII. There was the nna Julia, whom to call
Wedded she was soine years, and to a man Pretty were but to give a feeble notion
Of fifty, and such husbands are in plenty ; Of many charms, in her as natural
And yet, I think, instead of such a ONE, As sweetness to the flower, or salt to occan,
'Twere better to have two of five-and-twenty, Her zone to Venus, or his bow to Cupid
Especially in countries near the sun, (But this last simile is trite and stupid).
And now I think on't, 'mi vien in mente,
Ladies even of the most uneasy virtue
Prefer a spouse whose age is short of thirty. Accorded with her Moorish origin;
LXIII. (Her blood was not all Spanish, by the by:
'Tis a sad thing, I cannot choose but say, In Spain, you know, this is a sort of sin).
And all the fault of that indecent sun, When proud Granada fell, and, forced to fly,
Who cannot leave alone our helpless clay, Boabdil wept; of Donna Julia's kin
But will keep baking, broiling, burning on, Some went to Africa, some stay'd in Spain,
That howsoever people fast and pray,
What men call gallantry, and gods adultery, She married (I forget the pedigree)
Is inuch more cominon where the climate's sultry. With an Hidalgo, who transmitted down
Where all is virtue, and the winter season
Sends si.. without a rag on, shivering forth
LXXI. ('T was snow that brought St. Anthony to reason): Yet Julia's very coldress still was kind, Where juries cast up what a wife is worth,
And tre:nulously gentle her small hand By laying whate'er sum, in mulct, they please on Withdrew itself from his, but left behind Thc lover, who must pay a handsome price,
A little pressure, thrilling, and so bland,
And slight, so very slight, that to the mind
'Twas but a doubt; but ne'er magician's wand
Wrought change with all Armida's fairy art Alfonso was the name of Julia's lord,
Like what this light touch left on Juan's heart. A man well looking for his years, and who
LXXII. Was neither much beloved, nor yet abhorr'd:
And if she met him, though she smiled no more, They lived together as most people do,
She look'da sadness sweeter than her sinile, Suffering each other's foibles by accord, And not exactly either one or two;
As if her heart had deeper thoughts in store Yet he was jealous, though lie did not show it,
She must not own, but cherish'd more the while For jealousy dislikes the world to know it.
For that compression, in its burning core :
Even innocence itself has many a wile,
And will not dare to trust itself with truth,
And love is taught hypocrisy from youth. With Donna Inez quite a favourite friend :
LXXIII. Between their tastes there was small sympathy,
But passion most dissembles, yet betrays For not a line had Julia ever penn'd;
Even by its darkness: as the blackest sky Some people whisper (but no doubt they lic,
Foretells the heaviest tempest, it displays For malice still imputes some private end)
Its workings through the rainly guarded eye; That Inez liad, ere Don Alfonso's marriage,
And in whatever aspect it arrays
Itself, 'tis still the same hypocrisy.
Coldness or anger, even disdain or hate,
LXXIV. She took his lady also in affection. (chaste, Then there were sighs, the deeper for suppression, And certainly this course was much the best.
And stolen glances sweeter for the theft ; She flatter'd Julia with her sage protection,
And burning blushes, though for no transgression, And complimented Don Alfonso's taste :
Treniblings when met, and restlessness when And if she could not (who can :) silence scandal,
left: At least shc left it a more slender handle.
All these are little preludes to possession,
Of which young passion cannot be bereit,
And merely tend to show how greatly love is With other people's eyes, or if her own
Embarrass'd at first starting with a novice. Discoveries made, but none could be aware
LXXV. of this, at leasi no symptom e'er was shown.
Poor Julia's heart was in an awkward state ; Perhaps she did not know, or did not care,
She felt it going, and resolved to make Indifferent from the first, or callous grown ;
The noblest efforts for herself and mate, I'm really puzzled what to think or say,
For honour's, pride's, religion's, virtue's sake: She kept her counsel in so close a way.
Her resolutions were most truly great,
And almost might have made a Tarquin quake; Juan she saw, and, as a pretty child,
She pray'd the Virgin Mary for her grace, Caress d himn often-such a thing might be
As being the best judge of a lady's case.
And next day paid a visit to his mother,
And look'd extremely at the opening door, These few short years make wondrous alterations, Which, by the Virgia's grace, let in another; Particularly amongst sunburnt nations.
Grateful she was, and yet a little sore-
Again it opens, it can be no other :
'Tis surely Juan now-No! I'in afraid
That night the Virgin was no further pray'd. Changed; for the dame grew distant, the youth shy,
Should rather face and overcome temptation, There surely will be little doubt with some
That flight was base dastardly, and That Donna Julia knew the reason why ;
Should ever give her heart the least sensation; But as for Juan, he had no more notion
That is to say, a thought beyond the common Than he who never saw the sea or ocean.
Preference, that we must fecl upon occasion,