arm, lest the hand should be expected to accompany it. Pat Michaelson, a gay aide-de-camp, admired them all, but he was too dissipated to be fixed; the laird of Craigclarty cast a sheep's eye at the eldest, but he went off, whistling

"I'm over young to marry yet."

At length a man of war hove in sight, and he loomed like one richly laden: his fingers were bediamonded with rings, he had a jewel of high value for a brooch, a repeating watch, the nine gems as seals, boxes, canes, trinkets, and shawl waistcoats; every thing looked comfortable about him. Besides, he had arrived at high military rank, and had saved a round sum of ready money. There were a few drawbacks on this concern; namely, that he was neither tall nor handsome, was climate-worn and lame, had lived very hard, and seemed very bilious and lusty; from his temporary lameness he could not dance. The case required consultation; he was an old bird, and could not be caught with chaff; he had been a gay deceiver, and thrice slipped his neck out of a noose in which he had been half secured. He was a general lover, and the cousins of the seven ladies had already set their caps at him. No time was to be lost: he had been introduced to them in the morning, and he was to be at the ball at night. The sisters contrived to keep two always disengaged, in order to look out for prizes, whilst the other five were in the merry dance. The hero arrived, supported by an Irish Captain and a mercantile friend, the former brought him into line with the two vidette sisters, one of whom took the

Captain's arm, whilst the other engaged the merchantman. Isabella was the sister on the right flank, and Septima the light infantry of the left; the friend of the family drew out Isabella so as to have it in his power to open in high terms on the good qualities of all the sisters, and in the praise of the fair sex he was no niggard. A feint, or demonstration, was now made on the right; whilst Septima made a diversion so as to keep the mercantile friend employed. The first attempt failed; the artillery of the eye was silenced by perceiving this great gun direct the elevation of his glances towards Amanda, then quitting a partner at the conclusion of a dance; the Captain, by a forward movement, brought her down to bear upon the rich veteran; and, separating from his wing, left an interval through which she marched up, supported by the arm of the former. Mercator was drawn off by Septima, and thrown into confusion by her youthful charms, so that the main body was separated from all communication with the second corps, and had no reserve at command. The able Hibernian embraced this favourable opportunity, (what would he not have embraced to serve a lady?) and, disengaging himself from Amanda, skirmished in sight; whilst the man of war was led off captive to a bench in the rear of the dancers; placed betwixt Isabella and Amanda, the wounded chief remained for some hours,

"Looked and sighed, looked and sighed,

Looked and sighed, and sighed again."

The protector-general (such was the Captain's nickname), now returned and poured in the grape and

round of his battery on the defeated spirit, who had entered the room Bacchi plenus (full of wine). Amanda retreated for a short time, but returned to the charge and found the eloquence of the sister star, and the impudence (boldness or valour let us call it) of the allied power had decided the fate of the day. Mercator escaped slightly wounded, and recovered in a few days; but the man of love, wine, and war, was led off the field and placed at home on his parole, whilst the sisters retired with flying colours, and the able Captain made good his quarters at home or elsewhere, for he was every where at home, and with him

"Ubi bene, ibi patria,"

was the device of his standard.

On the ensuing morn, or rather at noon thereof, the vanquished victor sought a parley with the son of Erin, and he (the latter) was demanded at a court of enquiry, at the seven stars. He had a rendezvous with a German lady, and a call to make at a banker's on a subject of finance; so various were his duties and occupations. It is believed that he first attended the lady's court, to enquire into the strength and resources of the captive chief, and to concert future plans of operation. He put off the Germanic alliance for a day, and his wife for a week. Whether he attended the banker or not regards not the present subject; but he repaired to the prisoner's quarters in the quality of a parlementaire, nor was the gift of the gab denied him, love, logic, and liquor being his forte. The steady merchant appeared and talked of the terms of an

honourable retreat; the chief shook his head; the Irishman would admit of no appeal but to the sword ; he was a polished and dangerous blade himself; a piece of well-tempered steel, and fit for any thing except a pulpit. In honourable love no ransom is taken, the man of war had advanced too far, for he had made proposals and terms already; he accordingly struck his flag, and shortly after filed off (not in Indian files) · by the side of the white serjeant, who did her duty by him ever after. It is asserted by some that she commanded in chief, and that one of her sisters, who passed the line with her, was second in command; whether this was the case or not is doubtful, but all agree in stating that the husband is happy, and his happiness is increasing yearly. The captain, the zealous and faithful ally of the family, continued to serve in the same way, and arrived at more honours than emolument. Thus ended this match-making farce, which is of a far more easy and elegant cast than those of the counties of Galway and Roscommon to wit; the palm must therefore be given where due: and if this gentle campaigning, or civil war, these ruses de la petite guerre, or belle-stratagems, can prove of any use to parties concerned in such manœuvres, they are offered without a comment by a friend to the fair

sex.

SCOTUS.

European Magazine.

TABLE TALK,

ON LONDONERS AND COUNTRY PEOPLE.

I Do not agree with Mr. Blackwood in his definition of the word Cockney. He means by it a person who has happened at any time to live in London, and who is not a Tory-I mean by it, a person who has never lived out of London, and who has got all his ideas from it.

The true Cockney has never travelled beyond the purlieus of the Metropolis, either in the body or the spirit. Primrose-hill is the Ultima Thule of his most romantic desires; Greenwich Park stands him in stead of the Vales of Arcady. Time and space are lost to him. He is confined to one spot, and to the present moment. He sees every thing near, superficial, little, in hasty succession. The world turns round, and his head with it, like a roundabout at a fair, till he becomes stunned and giddy with the motion. Figures glide by as in a camera obscura. There is a glare, a perpetual hubbub, a noise, a crowd about him; he sees and hears a vast number of things, and knows nothing. He is pert, raw, ignorant, conceited, ridiculous, shallow, contemptible. His senses keep him alive; and he knows, inquires, and cares for nothing farther. He meets the Lord Mayor's coach, and without ceremony treats himself to an imaginary ride in it. He notices the people going to court or to a city-feast, and is quite satisfied with the show. He