In taste, Betty's fellow

Was never yet seen;
She'll line it with yellow,
And trim it with green!

NO LOVE WITHOUT MONEY.

THOMAS HUDSON.]

[Tune-"Geoffry Muffencap

IF you will list, I vow, sirs,

I'll tell you of a row, sirs,

Caused me to part with my sweetheart,

I'm telling of it now, sirs.

Indeed I am.

One night I went to meet her,
With true love I did greet her,
When in she looks at a pastrycook's,

And wanted me to treat her.

Indeed she did.

At this I felt quite funny,

Says I, "My charming honey,

I've lots of love, as you may prove,

But, lack, I've got no money!

Indeed I an't."

Says she, "Young man, 'tis plain, sir,
Your love is all in vain, sir,

Unless you've cash to cut a dash,

My heart you'll never gain, sir.

Indeed you wont."

Says I, "You can't mean so, miss?
My heart is in a glow, miss!
I loves you true, I swears I do,
As very well you know, miss.

Indeed you do."

Says she, "You foolish sot, sir,
You make my passion hot, sir;

Love makes you blink,-you cannot think,
That love will boil the pot, sir.

Indeed it wont."

I shock'd was when I heard her;
Says I," Don't say no further;
You surely will with coldness kill,
And you'll be hang'd for murder.

Indeed you will."

Says she, "You foolish elf, sir,
As you have got no pelf, sir,
Get rid of hope, go buy a rope,
And you may hang yourself, sir.

Indeed you may."

OH, ladies, I'm sure that you never would divine

There could be a susceptible bosom like mine;

Ah! there's not a man who with love has had dealings,

Has ever possess'd half my exquisite feelings.

My unfortunate fate to your bosoms will prove
How much I have suffer'd by falling in love;
My affections were fix d on Miss Caroline Freeling,
Who with me, I thought, had reciprocal feeling.

(Spoken.)-She had a beautiful romantic cast of countenance, and sensibility beamed from her bright blue eye, like sun rays from the liquid crysta!.

Oh, I thought no one like my dear Caroline Freeling,
For beauty and talent and excessive fine feeling.

When first I beheld her, she, on the piano,
Play'd, "Meet me by moonlight alone," in a manner
That struck me as being so chaste and so true;
But what struck me most was her blue satin shoe.
That blue satin shoe it was conquer'd my heart;
But the glance of her eye such love did impart,
That if any one else got a look from Miss Freeling,
Ah, me! I declare, it o'ermaster'd my feeling.

(Spoken.)-Oh, I shall never forget the soft languish- · ment of her look as she gave the tender passages in

(Sings.)-Meet me by moonlight alone,

And then I will tell you a tale,

Should be told by the moonlight alone,
In the grove at the end of the vale.

Oh, I thought no one like my dear Caroline Freeling,
For beauty and talent and excessive fine feeling.

The love in my bosom unable to smother,

My breast heav'd a sigh, and her's heaved another;
Embolden'd, I to her contess'd my affection,
And ask'd her to wed, and she had no objection.
The happy day settled, we met at the shrine,
The rites were begun, oh! but ere she was mine,
In a fit of hysterics fel! Caroline Freeling,
Which highly affected my sensitive feeling.

(Spoken.)-I couldn't guess the cause then; but afterwards when I learnt

I griev'd very much at such underhand dealing,
And was nigh overpower'd by excess of my feeling.

Oh, when she revived, she was led from the church
By her friends, and alone I was left in the lurch;
I wont tell you now the effect on my mind,
But I say her behaviour was very unkind.
Of affection for me she had ne'er had a spark,
And now she had fallen in love with the clerk
In the church, and, in short, faint away did Miss
Freeling,

Unable to check the excess of her feeling.

(Spoken.)-I shall never forget the shock I felt when I received the following billy from the deluded girl. -(Reads letter.)- Dear injured man, pardon a victim to extreme sensibility. The racks and tortures my agonized bosom feels in saying with ByronFare thee well, and if for ever,

Still for ever fare thee well.”—(crying.)

Oh, I can proceed no further.

Ah, when I read over this note from Miss Freeling, I leave you to guess at the state of my feeling.

JACOB COLE.]

PUFFING.

[Air-" Mrs. Simpkin lived at Leeds." WE are all aware that mischief is an easy thing to do, And hurting people's feelings by reports that are not

true;

I once knew of a powder-mill that did, perhaps in sport,

Hurt all the neighbours' feelings by one mischievous report.

In fact, this powder-mill blew up with such a shocking

shock,

Not a single door around but gave itself a double

knock;

The bells all rang aloud as though they never would have done,

And all the servants started, though they knew not where to run.

This shock, in shaking ev'ry house, while tiles and windows flew,

Kicked up a dust, of course, because it shook the carpets too;

The ladies hearing this report, of danger were pre

sumers,

And flying from their rooms, they added to the flying

roomers.

Now rumours are like snowballs-by trav'ling get enlarg'd,

Some guns which lay on shelves went off, although they were not charg'd;

Old Snubbs was busy shaving when the sudden shock

arose,

His razor slipp'd-and cut, they say, two inches off his

nose.

The cook became a Quaker, though he long had been a fryer,

To see the fish, good soles, jump from the pan into

the fire;

To see the soot come tumbling down o'er fish and fowl, good lack!

Until the soot had dress'd them nicely in a suit of black.

The grocer, busy mixing tea, was knock'd down by surprise

At this report, that gunpowder so suddenly should

rise;