While pleas'd Thalia deigns to write
The flips and bounds of Alma's flight.
My fimple fyftem shall fuppofe,
That Alma enters at the toes;
That then the mounts by juft degrees
Up to the ancles, legs, and knees;
Next, as the fap of life does rife,
She lends her vigour to the thighs;
And, all these under-regions past,
She neftles fomewhere near the waift;
`Gives pain or pleasure, grief or laughter;
As we shall fhew at large hereafter.

Mature, if not improv'd by time,

250

255

260

Up to the heart she loves to climb;

From thence, compell'd by craft and age,

She makes the head her latest stage.

265

From the feet upward to the head— Pithy and fhort, fays Dick, proceed.

Dick, this is not an idle notion: Obferve the progrefs of the motion. First, I demonftratively prove

270

That feet were only made to move :
And legs defire to come and go;

For they have nothing else to do.

Hence, long before the child can crawl, He learns to kick, and wince, and fprawl:

275

To hinder which, your midwife knows
To bind those parts extremely close;

Left Alma, newly enter'd in,

And stunn'd at her own christening's din,

Fearful

280

}

Fearful of future grief and pain,
Should filently sneak out again.
Full piteous feems young Alma's cafe';
As in a luckless gamester's place,
She would not play, yet must not pass.

Again; as fhe grows fomething stronger,
And master's feet are swath'd no longer,
If in the night too oft he kicks,
Or fhews his loco-motive tricks ;
These first affaults fat Kate repays him;
When half-asleep, the overlays him.

Now mark, dear Richard, from the age
That children tread this worldly stage,
Broom-ftaff or poker they bestride,
And round the parlour love to ride;
Till thoughtful father's pious care

285

290

295

Provides his brood, next Smithfield Fair,

With fupplemental hobby-horses:

And happy be their infant courses !

Hence for fome years they ne'er stand still :

Their legs, you fee, direct their will;

300

From opening morn till setting fun,

Around the fields and woods they run :
They frisk, and dance, and leap, and play;

Nor heed what Freind or Snape can fay.

To her next stage as Alma flies,

305

And likes, as I have faid, the thighs,

With fympathetic power the warms

Their good allies and friends, the arms ;

And for the nymph in fecret grieves.
In dying accents he complains

Of cruel fires, and raging pains.

Leaves all the fwains, and fighs for one.
The nymph is warm'd with young defire

And feels, and dies to quench his fire,

They meet each evening in the grove :
Their parley but augments their love;
So to the priest their cafe they tell :
He ties the knot; and all goes well.

330

But, O my Mufe, juft diftance keep;

Thou art a maid, and must not peep.

And that young life and quickening fenfe
Spring from his influence darted thence.

So from the middle of the world
The Sun's prolific rays are hurl'd :

'Tis from that feat he darts those beams,
Which quicken Earth with genial flames.

Dick, who thus long had paffive fat, Here ftroak'd his chin, and cock'd his hat; Then flapp'd his hand upon the board;

340

345

And thus the youth put in his word.
Love's advocates, fweet Sir, would find him

A higher place than you affign'd him.

350

Love's advocates! Dick, who are thofe ?

The Poets, you may well suppose.

I'm forry, Sir, you have discarded

The men with whom till now you herded..
Profe-men alone for private ends,

355

I thought, forfook their ancient friends.
In cor fellavit, cries Lucretius;

If he may be allow'd to teach us.
The felf-fame thing foft Ovid fays
(A proper judge in fuch a case).
Horace's phrafe is, torret jecur;
And happy was that curious speaker.
Here Virgil too has plac'd this paffion.
What fignifies too long quotation?

360

In Ode and Epic, plain the case is,

365

That Love holds one of these two places.
Dick, without paffion or reflection,

I'll strait demolish this objection.

First, Poets, all the world agrees,
Write half to profit, half to please.
Matter and figure they produce;
For garnish this, and that for use;
And, in the ftructure of their feasts,

They feek to feed and please their guests:
But one may balk this good intent,
And take things otherwise than meant.
Thus, if you dine with my lord mayor,
Roaft-beef, and venifon, is your fare;
Thence you proceed to fwan and bustard,
And perfevere in tart and custard :
But tulip-leaves and lemon-peel

;

Help only to adorn the meal
And painted flags, fuperb and neat,
Proclaim you welcome to the treat.
The man of fenfe his meat devours;
But only fmells the peel and flowers;

370

375

380

385

And he must be an idle dreamer,

Who leaves the pie, and gnaws the ftreamer.

That Cupid goes with bow and arrows,

And Venus keeps her coach and sparrows,

390

Is all but emblem, to acquaint one,
The fon is fharp, the mother wanton.
Such images have sometimes shown
A mystic sense, but oftener none.

For who conceives, what bards devife,
That Heaven is plac'd in Celia's eyes;
Or where's the fenfe, direct and moral,
That teeth are pearl, or lips are coral♪

395

Your