Not long the God of joy and truth Then raise the goblet once again, M. CROSS READINGS. There is an amusement of a demi-literary kind, commonly called Cruss Reading. MR. SHIEL'S SPEECH, AT THE CATHOLIC ASSOCIATION. MR. EDITOR, WHEN last in the metropolis, chance directed my vagrant steps to a coffee house in Piccadily. On entering the room, I was struck by the appearance of a chubby looking John Bull, who was attempting, in a tolerably audible tone, to get through a leaf of the "Broad Sheets." However, instead of perusing it via the columns, he was spelling it straight across, and having noted down the jumblement this manoeuvre produced, my sketch book enables me to offer you the following Cross Readings. An investigation is going on in a distinguished regiment, relative to the braying of donkeys. A celebrated natural philosopher has lately discovered that the price of oats must fall if the steam coaches succeed. There is to be a meeting of the Biblicals, to take into consideration the propriety of-committing further depredations in the burglary line. Jos. Wolffe, Missionary, made a most eloquent display at the last meeting of-pick-pockets and black-guards. A famous pedestrian has engaged to-throw himself into the Thames. The Bon ton is at present taken up with-dinner for one shilling. A Lady, at Walsall, was lately delivered of—a Judge of Assize and an escort of Dragoons. At a late Charity Sermon the Collection amounted to-an immense shoal of herrings from the Atlantic. Parliament assembles on the 14th.-5s. upper, 2s. 6d. lower Seats, to see the Buffoons exhibit. A fine crop of potatoes this year-purchased by Murray for £6,000. The Birmingham Mechanics are a fine show of cattle. The last levee was considered a―good Fair. Beef and Mutton are— not the best quality Butter. In Scotland, at present, there is a great dearth of Old Women. During the late Elections there was a scarcity of— Pig-drivers. Wanted, a coachman, who canteach French and Italian-superior lectures on craniology-and present an address to his Majesty, concerning two hundred and eighty sheep, ex ported by the Lord Chancellor, as-Patentee of the Theatre Royal-Billings-gate. Arrived last night by the Liverpool Post Coach, a dozen fine West-Indian turtles,--they were immediately carried before the sitting aldermen. On Monday Evening, one Toby Williams, a Cornish Miner, for a trifling wager of five shillings, undertook to swallow-three hundred sail of Merchantmen just arrived from the Downs. NOTICE TO SPORTSMEN. To be sold, or hired out, during the season, a great variety of fine well-bred puppies. Gentlemen can be accommodated, by applying to-the Promenade in Bond Street and the Park, is now almost deserted, most of the fashionable loungers having left town for the country. A large Pike weighing about nine pounds, was caught last week in a pond belonging to a Mr. Baker, of Lewes, which exhibited an astonishing instance of voracity. Upon opening the fish there were discovered in its belly-three Elephants and a Rhinoceros, a present from the Dey of Algiers. Cooper's Portable Soup recommended to Naval Officers and persons visiting foreign climes. It possesses the most nutritious qualities, being wholly extracted from an old pair of blue stockings, and a. brown wig, supposed by Antiquarians to have belonged to the noted Rochester, were sold for fifty guineas to a gentleman collecting Uniques. Last week a labouring man in the neighbourhood of Richmond fell a victim to the stupid ignorance of a vile empiric, who undertook to prescribe for a liver complaint. The fellow, after having emptied a whole shop of poisonous drugs into the poor man's stomach, crammed him at last so unmercifully with pills and boluses amongst which was a quantity of mercury and arsenic, that the poor fellow died on Friday morning. When the body was opened, it was ascertained that he had swallowed no fewer than-13948 a prize of £20,000 sold in sixteenths at the office of lucky Bish, No. 8, Cornhill. On Tuesday morning, as a workman employed in some repair about the dome of St. Paul's was carelessly leaning against the temporary scaffolding erected round the ball, the balustrade gave way, and from the height of 450 feet he droppedhis hat into the street, which was instantly picked up by a link-boy. The Indefatigable of fourteen guns was last week launched from Plymouth Dock, where she has been undergoing some repairs. We understand she has been cut down, to her present size, out of -a huge pair of plush breeches from a slop shop in Monmouth Street. Ox The show of cattle at Smithfield market was larger than we have known for some weeks. en and weathers keep up their prices, but pigs have rather fallen, particularly the lank, long-legged, long-eared Lincolnshire breed. The plump, short Hampshire Hog is generally preferred to-the Fellows and Seniors of the two Universities, who have been so zealous in signing the Anti-catholic petition were convicted of smuggling forged signatures into the house. D. S. L. TO ROMANCE. CHILD of the Mountain! wild romance! Lo! from the crag of Alpine height, A thousand fancies crowd my view, What form emerges from the Deep, The lucid shapes of trackless air, Are sporting round his splendid way, Are circling 'neath his sway! |