ON OBSERVING

SOME NAMES OF LITTLE NOTE

RECORDED IN THE

BIOGRAPHIA BRITANNICA.

Он, fond attempt to give a deathless lot

To names ignoble, born to be forgot!
In vain, recorded in historic page,

They court the notice of a future age:
Those twinkling tiny lustres of the land
Drop one by one from Fame's neglecting hand:
Lethæan gulphs receive them as they fall,
And dark oblivion soon absorbs them all.

So when a child, as playful children use,
Has burnt to tinder a stale last year's news,

The flame extinct, he views the roving fire—

There goes my lady, and there goes the squire,

There goes the parson, oh! illustrious spark,

And there, scarce less illustrious, goes the clerk!

REPORT

OF AN ADJUDGED CASE, NOT TO BE FOUND
IN ANY OF THE BOOKS.

I.

BETWEEN Nose and Eyes a strange contest arose— The spectacles set them unhappily wrong;

The point in dispute was, as all the world knows, To which the said spectacles ought to belong.

II.

So Tongue was the lawyer, and argued the cause

With a great deal of skill, and a wig full of learning; While chief baron Ear set to balance the laws, So fam'd for his talent in nicely discerning,

III.

In behalf of the Nose, it will quickly appear,

And your lordship, he said, will undoubtedly find, That the Nose has had spectacles always in wear,

Which amounts to possession time out of mind.

IV.

Then holding the spectacles up to the court

Your lordship observes they are made with a

straddle,

As wide as the ridge of the Nose is; in short,

Design'd to sit close to it, just like a saddle.

V.

Again, would your lordship a moment suppose

('Tis a case that has happen'd, and may be again) That the visage or countenance had not a nose! Pray who wou'd, or who cou'd, wear spectacles

then?

VI.

On the whole, it appears-and my argument shows, With a reasoning the court will never condemn, That the spectacles plainly were made for the Nose, And the Nose was as plainly intended for them.

VII.

Then, shifting his side, (as a lawyer knows how)

He pleaded again in behalf of the Eyes:

But what were his arguments few people know,
For the court did not think they were equally wise.

VIII.

So his lordship decreed, with agrave solemn tone,
Decisive and clear, without one if or but-

That, whenever the Nose put his spectacles on,
By day-light or candle-light-Eyes should be

shut!

ON THE BURNING OF

LORD MANSFIELD'S LIBRARY,

TOGETHER WITH HIS MSS.

BY THE MOB, IN THE MONTH OF JUNE 1780.

I.

So then the Vandals of our isle,

Sworn foes to sense and law,

Have burnt to dust a nobler pile

Than ever Roman saw!

1

BURNING LORD MANSFIELD'S LIBRARY. 331

II.

And MURRAY sighs o'er Pope and Swift,

And many a treasure more,

The well-judg'd purchase and the gift

That grac'd his letter'd store.

III.

Their pages mangled, burnt, and torn,

The loss was his alone;

But ages yet to come shall mourn

The burning of his own.

ON THE SAME.

I.

When wit and genius meet their doom

In all devouring flame,

They tell us of the fate of Rome,

And bid us fear the same.