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Enter Baptista, Gremio, and Tranio. Bap. Signior Petruchio, how speed you with My daughter?
Pet. How but well, fir? how but well? It were impossible I should speed amiss.
Bap. Why, how now, daughter Catharine ? in your dumps ?
Cath. Call you me daughter? now I promise you,
You've show'd a'tender fatherly regard,
To wish me wed to one half lunatick;
A madcap ruffian, and a swearing jack,
That thinks with oaths to face the matter out.
Pet. Father, 'tis thus; yourself and all the world
That talk'd of her, have talk'd amiss of her:
If she be curst, it is for policy;
For she's not froward, but modest as the dove;
She is not hot, but temperate as the morn;
For patience she will prove a second Grisel,
And Roman Lucrece for her chastity :
And to conclude, we've 'greed so well together,
That upon sunday is the wedding-day.
Cath. I'll see thee hang’d on sunday first.
Gre. Hark, hark;
Petruchio! she says, she'll see thee hang’d first.
Tra. Is this your speeding? then, good night our part !
Pet. Be patient, firs, I choose her for myself;
If she and I be pleas’d, what's that to you
'Tis bargain’d 'twixt us twain, being alone,
That she shall still be curft in company.
I tell you, 'tis incredible to believe
How much she loves me: 0, the kindest Kate!
She hung about my neck; and kiss on kiss
She vy'd fo fast, protesting oath on oath,
That in a twink The won me to her love.
O, you are novices; 'tis a world to see,
How tame, when men and women are alone,
A meacock wretch can make the curftest shrew,
Give me thy hand, Kate; I will unto Venice,
To buy apparel 'gainst the wedding-day:
Father, provide the feast, and bid the guests;
I will be sure, my Catharine shall be fine.
Bap. I know not what to say; but give your hands :
God send you joy, Petruchio ! 'tis a match.
Gre. Tra. Amen, say we; we will be witnesses.
Pet. Father, and wife, and gentlemen, adieu ;
I will to Venice, sunday comes apace:
We will have rings, and things, and fine array;
And kiss me, Kate, we'll marry o'sunday.
[Ex. Petruchio and Catharina.
Gre. Was ever match clap'd up so suddenly ?
Bap. 'Faith, gentlemen, I play a merchant's part,
And venture madly on a desperate mart.
Tra. 'Twas a commodity lay fretting by you;
'Twill bring you gain, or perish on the seas.
Bap. The gain I seek, is quiet in the match.
Gre. No doubt but he hath got a quiet catch:
But now, Baptista, to your younger daughter;
Now is the day we long have looked for :
I am your neighbour, and was suitor first.
Tra. And I am one that love Bianca more
Than words can witness or your thoughts can guess.
Gre. Youngling! thou canst not love so dear as I.
Tra. Graybeard! thy love doth freeze.
Gre. But thine doth fry.
Skipper, stand back; 'tis that nourisheth.
Tra. But youth in ladies eyes that flourisheth.
Bap. Content you, gentlemen ; I will compound this strife :
'Tis deeds must win the prize; and he of both
That can assure my daughter greatest dower,
Shall have Bianca's love.
Say, signior Gremio, what can you assure her?
Gre. First, as you know, my house within the city
Is richly furnished with plate and gold,
Basons and ewers to lave her dainty hands :
My hangings all of Tyrian tapestry;
In ivory coffers I have stuff’d my crowns ;
In cypress chests my arras, counterpanes,
Costly apparel, tents, and canopies,
Fine linen, Turkey cushions boss’d with pearl;
Valance of Venice gold in needle-work;
Pewter, and brass, and all things that belong
To house, or housekeeping: then, at my farm
I have a hundred milch-kine to the pail,
Sixscore fat oxen standing in my stalls;
And all things answerable to this portion.
Myself am struck in years, I must confess;
And, if I die to-morrow, this is hers,
If, whilst I live, she will be only mine.
Tra. That only came well in. Sir, list to me;
I am my father's heir, and only fon;
If I may have your daughter to my wife,
I'll leave her houses three or four as good,
Within rich Pisa walls, as any one
Old signior Gremio has in Padua ;
Besides two thousand ducats by the year
Of fruitful land; all which shall be her jointure.
What, have I pinch'd you, fignior Gremio ?
Gre. Two thousand ducats by the year of land !
My land amounts but to so much in all;
That she shall have, besides an argofy
That now is lying in Marseilles's road.
What, have I chok'd you with an argofy ?
Tra. Gremio, 'tis known, my father hath no less
Than three great argofies, besides two galliasses,
And twelve tight gallies : these I will assure her,
And twice as much, whate'er thou offer’st next.
Gre. Nay, I have offer'd all; I have no more;
And she can have no more than all I have;
If you like me, she shall have me and mine.
Tra. Why, then the maid is mine from all the world,
By your firm promise; Gremio is outvied.
Bap. I must confess, your offer is the best; And, let
father make her the assurance,
She is your own; else, you must pardon me:
If you should die before him, where’s her dower ?
Tra. That's but a cavil; he is old, I young.
Gre. And may not young men die as well as old ?
Bap. Well, gentlemen, then I am thus resolved:
On sunday next, you know, my daughter Catharine
Is to be married: now, on sunday following
Bianca shall be bride to you, if you
Th'assurance make; if not, to fignior Gremio :
And so I take my leave, and thank you both. [Exit.
Gre. Adieu, good neighbour. Now I fear thee not:
Sirrah, young gamefter, your father were a fool
To give thee all; and, in his waining age,
Set foot under thy table: tut! a toy !
An old Italian fox is not so kind, my boy.
Tra. A vengeance on your crafty wither'd hide !
Yet I have fac'd it with a card of ten :
'Tis in my head to do my master good :
I see no reason but suppos’d Lucentio
May get a father, call d suppos’d Vincentio ;
And that's a wonder: fathers commonly
Do get their children; but in this case
Of wooing, a child shall get a fire, if
I fail not of my cunning.
[Sly Speaks to one of the servants. Sly. Sim, when will the fool come again?
Sim. Anon, my lord.
Sly. Give's some more drink here -- where's the tapster? here,
Sim, eat some of these things.
Sim. So I do, my lord.
Sly. Here, Sim, I drink to thee.
Enter Lucentio, Hortensio, and Bianca.
VIDLER, forbear; you grow too forward, fir:
you so soon forgot the entertainment
Her sister Catharine welcom'd
Hor. But, wrangling pedant, know, this lady is
The patroness of heavenly harmony:
Then give me leave to have prerogative;
And when in musick we have spent an hour,
Your lecture shall have leisure for as much.
Luc. Preposterous ass! that never read so far
To know the cause why musick was ordain'd:
Was it not to refresh the mind of man
After his studies, or his usual pain?
Then give me leave to read philosophy,
And, while I pause, serve in your harmony.
Hor. Sirrah, I will not bear these braves of thine.
Bian. Why, gentlemen, you do me double wrong,
To strive for that which resteth in
I am no breeching scholar in the schools;
I'll not be tied to hours, nor 'pointed times,
But learn my lessons as I please myself :
And, to cut off all strife, here fit we down,