MISCELLANEOUS THOUGHTS *.
LL men's intrigues and projects tend,
By several courses, to one end;
*This, and the other little Sketches that follow, were, among many of the fame kind, fairly written out by Butler, in a fort of poetical Thefaurus, which I have before mentioned. Whether he intended ever to publifh any of them as feparate diftinct thoughts, or to interweave them into fome future compofitions, a thing very usual with him, cannot be ascertained; nor is it, indeed, very material to those who are fond of his manner of thinking and writing. I have ventured to give them the title of Mifcellaneous Thoughts; but I have not been over-curious in placing them in any methodical order. Out of this magazine he communicated to Mr. Aubrey that genuine fragment printed in his life, beginning,
No Jefuit e'er took in hand
To plant a church in barren land,
Nor ever thought it worth the while
A Swede or Rufs to reconcile, &c.
The publishing of Mifcellaneous Thoughts, or, what paffes under the name of Table-talk, might be justified by many names of the greatest authority in the learned world; and these fallies of wit, unconnectedly printed, fometimes give more pleasure than when they are interfperfed in a long and regular work; as it is often more entertaining to examine jewels feparately in a cabinet, than to fee them adorning a prince's crown or a
To compafs, by the propereft fhows,
Whatever their defigns propofe;
And that which owns the fairest pretext
Is often found the indirect'st.
Hence 'tis that hypocrites still paint
Much fairer than the real faint,
And knaves appear more just and true
Than honeft men, that make lefs fhew:
The dulleft idiots in disguise
Appear more knowing than the wife;
Illiterate dunces, undiscern'd,
Pafs on the rabble for the learn'd;
And cowards, that can damn and rant,
Pafs mufter for the valiant:
For he that has but impudence,
To all things has a just pretence,
And, put among his wants but shame,
To all the world may lay his claim.
HOW various and innumerable
Are those who live upon the rabble !
'Tis they maintain the church and state,
Employ the priest and magiftrate;
Bear all the charge of government,
And pay the public fines and rent;
Defray all taxes and excifes,
And impofitions of all prices;
royal robe. One may venture to add, that thefe of our Author must have a kind of additional recommenda tion, by the agreeable fingularity of their being in verft.
Bear all th' expence of peace and war,
And pay the pulpit and the bar;
Maintain all churches and religions,
And give their pastors exhibitions ;
And those who have the greatest flocks
Are primitive and orthodox;
Support all fchifmatics and fects,
And pay them for tormenting texts;
Take all their doctrines off their hands,
And pay them in good rents and lands
Discharge all coftly offices,
The doctor's and the lawyer's fees,
The hangman's wages, and the scores.
Of caterpillar bawds and whores ;
Discharge all damages and costs
Of Knights and Squires of the Poft;
All statesmen, cutpurses, and padders,
And pay for all their ropes and ladders ;
All pettifoggers, and all forts
Of markets, churches, and of courts;
All fums of money paid or spent,
With all the charges incident,
Laid out, or thrown away, or given
To purchase this world, hell, or heaven.
SHOULD once the world refolve t' abolish
All that 's ridiculous and foolish,
It would have nothing left to do,
T' apply in jeft or earnest to,
No business of importance, play,
Or ftate, to pass its time away.
THE world would be more just, if truth and lyes, And right and wrong, did bear an equal price; But, fince impoftors are fo highly rais'd, And faith and juftice equally debas'd, Few men have tempers, for fuch paltry gains, T' undo themselves with drudgery and pains.
THE fottish world without diftinction looks
On all that paffes on th' account of books;
And, when there are two fcholars that within
The fpecies only hardly are a-kin,
The world will pafs for men of equal knowledge,
If equally they've loiter'd in a college.
CRITICS are like a kind of flies that breed
In wild fig-trees, and, when they 're grown up, feed
Upon the raw fruit of the nobler kind,
And, by their nibbling on the outward rind,
Open the pores, and make way for the fun
To ripen it fooner than he would have done.
AS all Fanatics preach, fo all men write,
Out of the ftrength of gifts and inward light,
In spite of art; as horses thorough pac'd
Were never taught, and therefore go more fast.
IN all mistakes the strict and regular
Are found to be the desperat'st ways to err,
And worst to be avoided; as a wound
Is faid to be the harder cur'd that's round;
For error and mistake, the less they' appear,
In th' end are found to be the dangerouser;
As no man minds thofe clocks that use to go
Apparently too over-fast or flow.
THE trueft characters of ignorance
Are vanity, and pride, and arrogance;
As blind men ufe to bear their nofes higher
Than those that have their eyes and fight entire,
THE metaphyfic 's but a puppet motion
That goes with fcrews, the notion of a notion;
The copy of a copy, and lame draught
Unnaturally taken from a thought;
'That counterfeits all pantomimic tricks,
And turns the eyes like an old crucifix;
That counterchanges whatfoe'er it calls
B' another name, and makes it true or false;
Turns truth to falfehood, falsehood into truth,
By virtue of the Babylonian's tooth.
'TIS not the art of schools to understand,
But make things hard, instead of being explain'd;
And therefore those are commonly the learned'
That only study between jeft and earnest:
For, when the end of learning 's to pursue
And trace the fubtle steps of false and true,
They ne'er confider how they 're to apply,
But only listen to the noise and cry,
And are fo much delighted with the chace,
They never mind the taking of their preys.
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